Cheers to Forty Years

Honestly, I always thought 40 was A LONG ways away. I thought it was “Over the Hill.” Now for some you’re likely wondering why and how I came to this. Well, 40 is the first birthday party I can remember my Dad having. I was only four years old, but I remember my mom decorating our garage with “Over the Hill” balloons and decor. I slightly recall there being a surprise element to it. And that was the day I thought “WOW 40 is old!”

Now here I am “Over the Hill.” And I can humbly say that 40 ain’t old! In fact, I am grateful to see 40. I’m honored to have my small piece of the American Dream. I’m grateful to be healthy and surrounded by family and friends that love me.

One thing I learned in my 30s was that friendship means so much more than just having entourage to snap it up with. Life has so much more meaning than STUFF and a salary (that’s another blog). I’ve developed some amazing bonds that I couldn’t have even imagined just five-ten years ago.

But the most amazing thing is learning my place in life. . . hearing my God given calling and taking the steps to fulfill it. Now I know everyone expects to read about how awesome my husband and kids are. . .and they are! But today I am doing what we forget to do as moms and wives. . . reflecting on ME. I’ve learned that no matter how great friends and family are. . . alone time is superlative.

Now there is something that has carried over from my twenties, I still prefer a nice gathering of family and friends over a nightclub anyday. I can rock with a DJ or Live Band ( As long as they don’t mess up “The Wobble.”). I still love to eat boiled crawfish, and could with every meal. I’m still totally underwhelmed by superficiality. Memories mean more than the latest trends. I literally married my DREAM MAN . . . a CHEF. HA! Seriously, my husband is a hard worker and for that I’m grateful. I know that as long as he is by my side, the next 40 years is sure to be an adventure. Add that to my two amazing kids. . . dash on a little family and friends. . . and that is my cheers to 40!

And you guessed it. . . I still need to know #wherethehellarethesocks

Give me ONE Pair! I need two Pair. . . and a Bear!

HELLO!!!  WOOOHOOOO!!  We have made it to Friday. . .said no mom ever!  Why? Because Friday means keeping kids busy for the entire day while trying to mate socks.  I promise finding a mate for Yogi Bear has to be simpler than keeping the mate to socks.  Or as Mom Falon stated “mating anything that comes in pairs.”  I would pay hard earned money to figure out #wherethehellarethesocks  Now, I know all of the single folks and the SUPER organized mom is going to say “Just pin them together.”  Uh, yeah another task that will lead to #wherethehellarethepins.

So yesterday most mom’s were super excited about #PayYourAgeDay at Build-A-Bear Workshop.  I mean what other time can we totally stoke our kids for as little as $1.  I for one just KNEW my princess would be stuffing her favorite bear for $3.30 (with tax).  But, not so fast for us right!  Before stores even opened Build-A-Bear sent out a panicked Facebook, Tweet, IG, Email, Carrier Pigeon saying “Wait, we didn’t know it would be this big.  We have stopped the promotion.”  Ok, come on now.  You didn’t know that every parent would skedaddle from their homes to take advantage of this.  You didn’t know that we would LOVE to pay prices equivalent to a toddler’s age for your $50 bear.  #haveaseat You knew better.  You just didn’t plan nor execute effectively.  PAYYOURAGEFAILED

Needless to say, if you missed  Pay Your Age Day Build-A-Bear has so graciously agreed to give you $15 off of your next bear. BUT you must login before Sunday to screenshot the coupon.  Why thank you Build-A-Bear of course I want to now pay $35 for what you told me would be $3.  #insertmompun #givememy3dollarbear #wherethehellarethesocks #BuildaBear #NopeDontBuildaBear

Everyday is laundry day!

Ok confession. I absolutely abhor doing laundry. Surely my laundry isn’t the only one that multiplies like those Gremlins from the 80s. No matter how many loads I wash the clothes proliferate like cells in a Chem Lab. And yes, the socks are lost under the mountains of clothes and they do not have mates. I’ve seriously considered learning to make socks just so my husband can stop asking me #wherethehellarethesocks Newsflash I don’t know husband. They’re somewhere under the towels, undies, and rocks that made it into the piles from the kids pockets.

Speaking of finding things in the dryer. Am I the only mom that gets excited when loose change or even good old dollar bills turn up in the washer. It’s like instant oat day!! Though, not quite as exhilarating as finding matching socks.

Thankful

As I sit here in rare silence, I realize how truly thankful I am for the sleepless nights, messy rooms, nonstop noise, and mommy songs of my children. It hasn’t been many years ago that I was told I would never have children.

You see this silence could be my forever. But instead it’s a reminder of how God will grant you the desires of your heart. I absolutely get overwhelmed. I absolutely need mommy time. But I most assuredly need my children. I need them to remind me of pure love. I need them to remind me that no matter how slow the water runs out of my pipes or how quickly they have dump out all of the toys that God chose me! He chose me to love and care for two of His most precious jewels. I know that on the darkest of days I can look at my children and see joy.

I look at them and I’m reminded of one thing…. much like God, they love me so much more than I deserve some days.

And for that “But Mom” is thankful.

Happy Thanksgiving

Halloween or Nah

My kids were eager to “trick or treat” tonight. And honestly I was excited for them. We spend so much time preparing them for life that often we forget to just let them be kids. Many people now have created such negativity around kids simply getting candy and having fun. I suppose for some dressing up and getting candy for one day may turn the kids into some satanic vulture. For the rest of us, our kids will take off their costumes and soon forget they even collected all of that candy.

As a mom, I have a lot to protect my kids from. But today I will not protect them from smiling faces and Jack-o-lanterns filled with candy. I will not protect them from their Black Panther or Minnie Mouse costumes. I will not protect them from the simple joy or getting all the candy their hands can hold. And if your kid stopped by they too left with an arm filled with candy.

Happy Halloween!

Recharged

Hello! It has been a while. But I have not forgotten about nor abandoned my blog. “But Mom” needed a recharge. In the prices of trying to be a superhero, a nurse, a counselor, a personal stylist, a personal paparazzi, a gourmet chef, a wife, a full time working professional, and a whole plethora of other things I forgot to take care of me. Now I know some of the moms reading this believe that married moms have it SUPER EASY. Well, I won’t crush your fantasies. But I won’t fuel them either (you’ll catch that in carpool).

Nevertheless, I want to remind ALL moms that some days it is ok to do NOTHING! The dishes will not turn into decay overnight. The pile of laundry that needs to be put away. Well, I can guarantee it will be there waiting on you later. Unless some of you moms know about a laundry god I’ve overlooked. It’s really ok that the kids had a Pop Tart instead of soft scrambled egg whites with duck bacon and fruit from your own backyard. It’s even ok if they eat PB&J in place of grilled shrimp with steamed asparagus. And the absolute worst…. my kids may have even had JUICE with dinner and it may have had Red dye.

And tonight “But Mom” is ok with that. In their eyes I am still a Super Hero. And I’m recharged so I can put on my cape tomorrow!!

#wherethehellarethesocks #idontevencareaboutthesocks #ihadsugarinmytea #realsugar #itsallgood #butmom #reloaded

Toodles!

Co-Parenting 2.0

Hello!  Well, our big boy will be SEVEN (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) on Fimg_6184riday! So those of you that know me now that I did not give birth to Josiah. But I will sprinkle itching powder on ANYONE that says he is not my son.  Josiah is as much a part of me as Corrinne.  Therefore it goes without saying that I am ecstatic to see this little fellow coming into himself.  Now I will not say that it is not easy. Yes, he is indeed the snakes and snails and puppy dog tails little boy!  But under all of that little boy is the most genuine and loving kid you will ever meet.  To SOME co-parents it may seem like well who cares.  Not this one.  So make sure you send him some birthday love when you say your prayers.

Of course with a “Bonus Son” there is co-parenting.  Now that’s where the real purpose of this blog comes in.  Often I listen to the horror stories of co-parenting. Of how the mother does this or that. Nah, that doesn’t happen over here. That does not mean that there are not days that we disagree. Shoooot.  It happens.  BUT what I do know is that we all love Josiah and are working hard to give him the foundation he deserves and needs to succeed.  I want to challenge my readers in co-parenting

situations to “Take the Power from the Past.”  Don’t allow what did or did not to lay the foundation of your co-parenting.  Sip you some wine and work together.  Healthy children come from healthy parents.  If you need to sip the wine together. Laugh together. Cry together.  But most importantly LOVE TOGETHER.  The kid deserves it.

Let’s get out there and find the socks (OK so maybe you’re just buying socks like me).  Let’s get out there and knock out that pile of laundry (is there really an end to it).  But more so. . . let’s get out there and build our future generation of parents.

#coparenting #takethepowerfromthepast #wherethehellarethesocks #nomorelaundry #happybirthdayJosiah #RockingBonusMom

“Sauce & Bones” and Swear Words

HELLO!  Happy Sunday Folks.  Yes, it is already time to get everything in order for Monday.  But at least I now have a routine and everyone goes off to bed with glee.

So take a trip with me to Saturday night, August 25th.  I had planned a little gathering for my husband at this local spot with music and dancing. Though we cater, I ordered a sandwich tray from a local grocer, a cake from a local baker, and a wing platter from a local BBQ and wing joint.  Every single pickup went GREAT except the wings. Now of course I could have ordered anywhere, but as a small business owner I wanted to support local small businesses.  I called to place the order and pay for the wings around 4:28 PM.  The cashier tells me that everything is in place and they will be ready at 8:00. So around 8:45 my friend walks in to pick the wings up. They begin to tell her “We don’t drop food until it has been paid for.” So I tell her they have already been paid for and screenshot her the transaction.  At this time the owner approaches and says he is resolving it.  Much to our surprise he comes out of the gate hostile.  Come Man! These are wings.  You are not selling jewelry in a private showcase.  Are you seriously becoming combative over wings.  I then arrive and attempt to show the owner the transaction receipt myself. He refuses to review it and tells me “I don’t care what your bank says we haven’t been paid.” I then ask him what are our options.  Keep in mind I’m actually still prepared to overlook his doltishness.  However, he THEN says “look I don’t know what the (derogatory) you don’t understand.” I say I will just leave back out of the transaction and we are done. He refused. SO I decided to just take it up with my financial institution and leave. He begins following me out of the door shouting at the top of his lungs. Even AFTER I crossed his lease line/threshold he continued behind me.  Then yelling “Don’t you ever come back you Fat A** B*tch.”  Several other derogatory and demeaning comments were made while following me and making indirect threats. At this point I felt threatened and called the police.  After all I am a woman being chased down and yelled at by a man/business owner. I have no clue if this person has a weapon or what.  He then gets right in my face and yells “WHAT THE F*** are you gonna do?”  He repeated this several times.  Sadly, this is a married male who also is allegedly a medical doctor.  I pray that he does not treat his spouse or patients this way (or employees).  Seems a bit dangerous. . .

Needless to say he can keep his “Sauce & Bones and Swear Words.” I don’t typically order a side of disrespect with my meals.

I can’t close this blog without 1)paying tribute to the late great Aretha Franklin 2) demanding my R-E-S-P-E-C-T!

#butmom #wherethehellistherespect

Not a creature was stirring. . .But Mom!

HELLO! Back-to-School routines are in full effect.  Kids are fed, bathed, and off to bed by 8:00.  So now all is quiet and Mom can rest. BUT MOM!! Mom is finishing her to do list.  Now to the PRO MOMS that have everything perfectly mapped out and can dash into bed too. . .whoopty doo! For the rest of us that finish up laundry, set out clothes, check your calendars, etc. Girl, I feel your pain!  But really, what’s a few extra minutes awake at night worth you ask.  It’s worth a few more minutes of sleep in the morning.  Now What!

Now for those of us “Work-at-home moms,” we often use the kids bedtime as an opportunity to work! This is imperative because you also have to get all of your errands run and cook a well balanced meal (Pun certainly intended. You cook whatever you feel l like cooking.) before the afternoon carpool.  So yes, while Perfect Patty is all nestled in bed. Work-at-home Wilma is sitting in front of a computer with visions of incomplete tasks all dancing in her head.

Of course. . . then there’s Dad’s need. Because let’s be honest they only really have one need.   I’ll just drop this right here on that note:  How Often Do Parents Have Sex? .  #sexisnotabadword #butmom #yesmomisawake #sleepwhen #momtigue

An elephant never forgets. I’m not an elephant.

HELLO!! Let’s be clear. . . I am not an elephant AND I am forgetful.  (I’ve often wondered how we know an elephant never forgets.)  A few days ago a fellow Mom posted that she forgot to pick her child up from camp.  She was lugubrious to say the least.  This is a totally normal feeling.  However, Moms to the rescue!  You are not a bad mom because you forgot.  Truth be told forgetting a child is admitted less often than it occurs.  This is the case because it is more socially acceptable to forget your keys, phone, wallet, debit card, passwords-but never children.  Yeah Right!  It happens to the best of us. Ev

en if you just temporarily get away from them in the store. It happens.  In fact 65% of parents state that they have temporarily lost a child while out.( How easy is it to leave a child behind?)
Funny story.  My niece, Olivia, was temporarily lost in her own home. Her parents had called the authorities and initiated a neighbor

string-around-finger-remember-LastPass-virtual-assistant-landscaper

hood search party.  This entire time Olivia was between the mattress and bed frame ASLEEP.  So yes, IT HAPPENS!

I have personally been headed to my car after church and then realize “WAIT! I need to get Josiah from children’s church.”  My mind was so focused on the next steps that I did not process the details of the steps.  Needless to say he is fine, Olivia is fine, and my friend’s daughter is fine.  In fact neither of the little lads even realized there was a problem.

No worries mom!  We are doing a great job.  We have found our kids, they have on socks (or at least shoes) and all is good in the world!